44 Reasons Why Computers Are Better Than Women
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A computer can wait forever for you.
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A computer doesn't compare you with it's past users.
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A computer doesn't get calls from it's past users while you're logged in.
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A computer doesn't mind how excited you get.
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A computer doesn't tell you how completely teriffic it's past users have
been.
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A computer is big in all the right places.
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A computer never forgets your birthday.
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A computer won't ask, "Are you in?"
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A computer won't ask, "Is there another computer?"
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A computer won't even talk about marriage.
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A computer won't fall in love with you just because you have sex.
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A computer won't get bitchy if you're slow to respond.
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A computer won't grade you on how much you send it.
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A computer won't look through your checkbook.
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A computer won't mind how many other accounts you have, or if you keep
getting new ones.
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A computer won't say, "Let's just be friends."
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A computer won't shave with your razor.
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A computer's maintainance personel don't cross-examine you every time you
log in.
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Computers are easy to turn on.
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Computers are ready when you are.
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Computers are very responsive.
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Computers aren't into finding out how far you'll go to keep your account.
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Computers do everything you tell them to.
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Computers don't care about age differences.
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Computers don't care if you're married.
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Computers don't get pregnant.
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Computers don't get upset if you use other computers.
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Computers don't insist on foreplay.
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Computers don't make you meet their parents.
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Computers don't mind if you share them with a friend.
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Computers don't mind spending hours on the phone with you.
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Computers don't play head games unless you ask them to.
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Computers never ask you to call them in the morning.
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Computers never have headaches,
or take rainchecks,
or have a curfew,
or have that time of the month.
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Computers won't mind if you don't like their friends.
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If you don't like the feel of one terminal you can easily switch to another
in less than a minute.
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Size doesn't count to a computer.
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The average computer session lasts four hours.
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With a computer, you never have to say you're sorry.
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You can log into several computers at once.
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You can turn off a computer.
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You can visit a computer any time you like, and it'll be up and ready
for you.
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You don't have to tell computers you love them.
quixote@toysmakeuspowerful.com